Blazing summer with fire rain is knocking at
the door in our part of the world. Sweltering heat will sap our soul. How would
the words flow? Ah…we wait for you dearest Jasmine Nights…
Blooms of perfume made
Sing their song in fragrant words
Drooping souls listen
*Kikobun is a literary form similar in format to haibun
Posted for Carpe Diem Time Machine #8,Perfume
&
Shared with Poetry Pantry @ Poets United
THIS is one of the best pieces of writing you have done. I read it three times and each time it is effective. You really got the feel of the heat across - I lived in Bahrain and Saudi Arabia a decade and have an idea what you mean. I like the kikkobun very much as a writing form - but really, here it fits so nicely. The trade-off between prose and haiku is great - ''Jasmine Nights'' the 'tense' wait, and beautiful expression. Made my morning!
ReplyDeleteWOW!!! VERY nicely done :D
ReplyDeletea beautiful songs for the trodden souls...............
ReplyDeleteI visualised your haiku! Heavenly ambiance!! :)
ReplyDeleteOh I love the thought of jasmine nights. Such a blessing when we live in perfume, jasmine does not thrive too well here, but we have a shrub called mock-orange with a very similar smell...
ReplyDeletethe scent of jasmine in a hot night can be intoxicating... can feel the heat in this...
ReplyDeleteYour words invoke the image of a lazy summer afternoon. The few words do convey a multitude of experiences. Beautiful. :)
ReplyDeletethese words paint such a lovely picture. full of hope.
ReplyDeleteWonderful kikobun Sumana! Yes, let it be a sweltering heat outside! One just have to take it momentarily!
ReplyDeleteHank
Jasmine nights and drooping souls..we can only hope they are raised in a fine toast...magical!
ReplyDeleteOh yes.. everything for me boils down to the fragrance of jasmine!! Agree!
ReplyDeleteHow delightfully refreshing the thought of jasmine nights. Isn't it the way that in oppressive weather we visualize that which would please us the most. Beautifully written Sumana.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely brilliant..! :D
ReplyDeleteLoved it!
xoxo
Scent as a benison for the drooping moves me. I could use some right now!
ReplyDeleteIt reminds me that the problem with hot humid season is everything smells kinda sour and damp. A light jasmine perfume in the air would certainly help. :)
ReplyDeleteBeautifully well crafted, Sumana. I like the metaphor of blooms singing their song! Oh yes, and the idea that everyone would 'listen' to them as well......as they wait for those jasmine nights.
ReplyDeleteThe sweetness of their song, like the freshness of their scent, is cool solace for 'drooping souls', exhausted from fiery heat.
ReplyDeleteI so enjoyed this, Sumana; what beautiful metaphors!
Poppy
Scented nights filled my thoughts, as I read your poem... I feel the yearning.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I love form.
"Jasmine nights." Was that term inspired by Princess Jasmine of Aladdin which happens to look like it takes place in India or? either way, I loved your piece, made me think about cultural celebrations at multicultural events! great read!
ReplyDeleteBravo!
ReplyDeleteZQ
this is really absolutely a beautiful piece of writing, i am familiar with haibun, will have to do some reading up on kikobun, thanks for sharing this form
ReplyDeletehappy you stopped by my blog
much love...
This is very beautiful. I love the sound of Jasmine nights.....and really like "drooping souls listen". I can feel the torpor in such heat. Our summers are like that in this valley - too hot to endure.
ReplyDeleteI feel Jasmine Nights - blessing! x
ReplyDeleteThis radiated heat and longing for sweet, fragrant, cooler nights. The form is perfect for the expressed thoughts.
ReplyDeleteLovely!
ReplyDelete"Sing their song in fragrant words"---this is beautifully worded!
ReplyDeleteSumana,
ReplyDeleteA beautiful style of poetry and with a topic which reminded me of wonderful summer evenings abroad. The warmth and the scent of fruits and blooms...
Eileen
A lovely form, and your description of hot summer is filled with sensory details.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite scent is jasmine. But I don't envy those hot nights. Lovely writing Sumana. I hope your world cools off a bit.
ReplyDeleteThose sweats from the heat can turn into a perfume. Lovely words, Sumana
ReplyDeleteI love the thought of drooping souls and jasmine nights.
ReplyDeleteDonna@LivingFromHappiness
Very evocative; fills me with longing.
ReplyDeleteVery beautifully written...
ReplyDeleteFew words... Grand meaning!
A beautiful poem.
ReplyDeleteNice - really like this style of poetry!
ReplyDeletethis is wonderful, Sumana! I live in the desert in Arizona, US and we face the searing heat of summer without the relief of Jasmine nights. especially love your phrase "fire rain" ~ a beautiful Kikobun!
ReplyDeleteSumana what a nicely written Kikobun ....
ReplyDelete