Tuesday, 19 August 2014

Paths

image source here

They leave their homes bidding goodbye  

Soft petals eager for a full bloom   

Walking side by side arm in arm            

All towards the same destination               

 

Soft petals eager for a full bloom   

Till time’s magic wand casts the spell       

All towards the same destination               

Tasting on the way the sweet and bitter fruit  

 

Till time’s magic wand casts the spell       

They firmly move on a slow twilight path                     

Tasting on the way the sweet and bitter fruit  

Their feet to turn stony gathering moss                 

 

They firmly move on a slow twilight path

Walking side by side arm in arm

Their feet to turn stony gathering moss

They leave for their new homes bidding goodbye

image source here

 


Note: leaving home for the first time the little children set out for school, a new world; youths rush towards fulfillment and the aged wait for the call to their real home. The poem is in Pantoum form though I took a bit liberty.

 


Posted forPoetry Jam where the prompt is Path

22 comments:

  1. All people walk the same path, it seems, though at different times. The destination is the same. I like your theme and also your use of the pantoum form, Sumana. I haven't used the form for quite a while!

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  2. Your poem reminds us that there is always a new path to walk on. We are lucky when someone walks side by side with us and we can face the bitter as well as the sweet together rather than alone. A beautiful write.

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  3. ah if only we knew when we were young what we know as we are more wise...always rushing to get away (i did too) is not always the way...and there is much to be said of roots....

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  4. It gives a feeling of anticipation and fulfillment seeing young kids starting school. It's the same path for all. Wonderful write Sumana!

    Hank

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  5. The pantoum form suits this lovely poem so well, Sumana. We see the same paths trodden by different people, and yet each traveller gathers different flowers from the wayside. I enjoyed reading it very much.

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  6. Beautiful poem that really sings of hope, i love the form and you have really crafted a lovely picture.

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  7. congratulations for hosting poetry jam and many more chances to come

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  8. The path to the rest of their lives. Enchanting.

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  9. So beautiful and the pantoum forms works really well here. My kids go back to school next week.

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  10. Unfolding from womb
    n tossing up into soil-
    the journey is pre-destined

    But its only the path
    wherein lies all wonders.

    NIce selection of topic...

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  11. this is a lovely form, i like the repetition pieces, and your theme of journeying and unknown destiny is well wrought in the imagery you used, very nice; have a good Wednesday

    much love...

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  12. The way back to school.. the return from summer's freedom.. a sweet path to walk to grow..lovely use of the form

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  13. That pantoum worked its way down the path nicely!

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  14. The path back to school is coming again, smiles ~ I love the playful innocence of walking to school ~

    I admire the form Sumana too as its very tricky ~

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  15. A difficult form.Good attempt.

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  16. Lovely! And loved the way your pantoum worked, reading very smoothly. I immediately thought of children leaving home,

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  17. So wonderfully sketched! Beautiful

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  18. Sumana, a beautiful pantuom! And a perfect subject for it too, the words flowed like a lovely path :-)

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  19. "The sweet and bitter fruit" ---- a beautiful image! Your pantoum is so well done!

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  20. True to form and beautiful Sumana. Love the metaphor of nature's blooms and our little ones....lovely imagery!

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  21. Love the form you've used here, Sumana. The poem itself has a wonderful, almost spiritual quality to it, in that I found it to be life affirming - a kind of ode to one of life's sweet passages.

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  22. In every phase we configure a new path, and those little children of yours will have a number of opportunities in life. I loved the line "Their feet to turn stony gathering moss", this is how we get mature. Great write!

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