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Saturday, 29 November 2014
Time
Eyes were new and so were the bones
Frolicking, chirping without moans
Summer-Spring of life with flowery frill
Universe sang just chill, chill, chill
Autumn’s still glowing with a bright light
Yet sinew’s losing that omnipotent might
Dawn, day and dusk have a strange new feel
Universe is singing chill, chill and chill
A time will come when harvest is done
The mind will long for the hidden sun
The sleepy physique will show time’s weal
Universe will whisper chill, chill, chill
The body and mind will be full of mirth
Awaiting keenly for another birth
Posted for Bjorn’s hosting Sunday-Mini-ChallengeTime-travel where we are to write a poem
using past, present and future time in the same poem @ Real Toads
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like seasons we too should flow......................
ReplyDeleteawaiting another birth... lovely. i love the feeling of peace in flowing..
ReplyDeleteThe "chill, chill, chill" displays how universe still goes on as a life passes from the spring and summer to an eventual winter. Only a mind at peace and a life lived whole would be full of mirth, waiting for the next birth.
ReplyDeleteA wonderful read. :-)
-HA
Loved the rhyming structure ... beautiful :-)
ReplyDeleteHow sensible to see life as that never ending wheel, we fight it of course but my moaning bones are telling the truth; "Chill out old man and make a little room".
ReplyDeleteTimes will come and go, marked by both deaths and births.
ReplyDeleteand so the cycle continues :)
ReplyDeleteSometimes the warmth has to come from within - universe is so cold.
ReplyDeleteUniverse's song of chill, chill, chill is preparing us for what is ahead....
ReplyDeleteThe truth wonderfully described.
ReplyDeleteI can deal with the body wearing out and giving up the ghost at an old age. When it happens to a person one might deem too young, I find it awfully sad.
Thank you for visiting at poetryofthenetherworld.blogspot.com
Great expression of the life cycle. 'Yet sinew’s losing that omnipotent might' - this is something I can definitely relate to, especially when I get up from the couch.
ReplyDeleteIt is real chilling with the impending winter! Nothing frightening but just physically chilling that is not ghost-like! Great rhyming Sumana!
ReplyDeleteHank
the seasons swirl one into the next...fluid...and seeming ever faster the older that i get....and perhaps chill has less to do with temperature and more to do with just going with the flow...smiles.
ReplyDeleteLoop of the life connected by the omnipotent nature...powerful poem x
ReplyDeletechill, chill, chill! if only.
ReplyDeletenice rhythmic flow to the lines.
ReplyDeleteAwaiting another birth is such a lovely thought.........
ReplyDeleteI like the repeat line between the different sections. A great way to organize the poem without using stanzas.
ReplyDeleteThe cycles of life so beautifully depicted, Sumana. Beautiful!
ReplyDeleteThe wheel turns--lovely write!!!
ReplyDeleteI love the line that you've employed for preposition...it personifies the Universe...I like that! :)
ReplyDeleteUniverse will whisper chill chill chill...
ReplyDeleteLoved it
What a wonderful circle of life. The repetitions are delicious, too.
ReplyDeleteLike the repetitions. Well done.
ReplyDeleteA beautiful piece!
ReplyDeleteWonderful passage of time through this verse....
ReplyDeleteI loved the flow...Words... And the feel it gives.
ReplyDeleteloved that repetitions. a "bouncy" feel to the poem. :)
ReplyDeleteI like forward to its rebirth ~ I like the refrain of chill, chill, chill ~
ReplyDeleteWinter does inspire a look back doesn't it? And we look forward to sunny days.
ReplyDeleteA wonderful homage to life, and time and seasons which brought to mind: To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: Ecclesiastes 3:1. Beautifully penned, Sumana.
ReplyDeleteHi, hope all is well, lomng time.............have a happy 2015
ReplyDelete