Thursday, 4 September 2014

A Day in Progress

image source here


I’m on the brick pathway as chiming clock tells me to move on. It takes a few steps from my door to reach there. As I walk I grieve for the vanishing thickets with their birdsongs and all the trees that have made room for the concrete. Vultures hover for a stray dog’s carcass. The narrow lane is littered with cow dung and dog turd. My rickshaw puller comes to take me to school. He grieves too. The battery driven eco friendly Totos have arrived in my town carrying more passengers, plying with more speed and less fare.

              

Blazing blue above

Black glasses cover all eyes

Brave sunshine school kids

 

Last minute preparation for Teacher’s Day Celebration is in full swing. Sweat streams as teachers and students rehearse their one act play and others remain busy in their own work schedule. One red and yellow batik print cotton shawl is needed for the dance recital. The teacher responsible is asking us if we could lend one. Ah flashes of lightning, strong wind and torrential rains rejuvenate every spirit. We all wait for a cool bright 5th September*.

 

My clean red brick road

Sparkling eyes dispel darkness

Soft prayer ripples

 

 

*5th September is celebrated as Teacher’s Day all over India in fond memory of the great teacher, philosopher, scholar and the second President of India Dr. Sarvepalli Radhakrishnan (1888-1975).

 

This is my first attempt at a haibun. I am not sure if I did the form justice.

 

 


Written for MTB d’Verse 

26 comments:

  1. nice glimpse into your culture sumana - have yet to ride a rickshaw and hope that i make it to india before the totos have taken over...smiles... happy delebration day tomorrow

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  2. I like the difference between the first and second. The first is sad, with the death of the dog; and the second is happy, with the celebration taking place. It sounds like the teacher day is quite a holiday!

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  3. I think these haibun works great.. the contrast between the two, with the haiku binding them together.. A teacher's day - what a great idea... maybe something to have elsewhere.

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  4. I can't speak to the form, but I sure enjoyed reading this. It's so pesonal, yet giving us a glimpse of India - its grief and cause for celebration. You did a great job here.

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  5. This is a fine form to use; I really need to use it more often myself; really enjoyed your slice-of-life Rilke tribute; nice work, & happy
    Teacher's Day too.

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  6. teachers day is such a cool concept...like we talked about over email we have teacher appreciation day but its pretty tame....nice slice of the every day though...

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  7. teacher's day is a great thing to have. Nice use of the form, too, by the way :)

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  8. What a lovely snapshot of your country, tradition and colors ~ I think its a great way to honor the man ~ I see you wrote a haibun, smiles ~ Its a great way to start, combining prose & haiku ~ As a tip, your haiku can be a contrast or something different about your prose but with a wee bit of similarity ~ Enjoyed this one Sumana & wishing you happy week ~

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  9. Love this peek into your edge of the world. From the rickshaw to the yellow batik shawl.

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  10. wow!!! this line blew me away:

    Vultures hover for a stray dog’s carcass. The narrow lane is littered with cow dung and dog turd.


    Where did you come up with this line? I love it/

    The whole poem is magnificent! and brilliant.

    :)

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  11. As long as one has the human connections.. i do no think the rest of it really matters..in fact sometimes the rest of it i know takes the real connections away...

    The poorer i am in past the stronger i am and share the connections that are true..i never think i have money now..even though i do..the connections grow stronger..not weaker..as money and material items are no longer objective realities in subjective true..

    of love true i know for truth..:)

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  12. I liked the glimpse into your world.

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  13. I am passionate about haibun - I really was entranced by the sincerity, culture and blending of prose and haiku here. I very much enjoyed this piece - and admire you for taking it on so well.

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  14. you did delivered a slice of everyday life... always cool to learn of other cultures

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  15. This really impressed upon me all the sounds and images you experience - and your feelings all interwoven. Nicely done. I think the form worked well here.

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  16. You took me with you through the streets to the school - you captured the "essence" in your haibuns but you gave us color, joy, smells, sights, sounds in the text. It was like little surprises found hidden along the paths.

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  17. Happy teachers day Sumana..loved your Haibun..

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  18. I believe you have done the form justice :)

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  19. Uplifting and beautiful Sumana - bald you took the plunge with this form, I think it suits you... With Best Wishes Scott www.scotthastie.com

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  20. You did the haibun perfectly well - the text is so nicely poetic to me with such details - very enjoyable read.

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  21. Your haibun evoked a picturesque image of where you are, I see it, smell it, hear it in my mind. :-)

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  22. I think that your Haibuns are perfect. Great portrait of the day 😊

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  23. nice glimpse into the everyday

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  24. A lovely piece! I really liked it.

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  25. My first exposure to the haibun was through Bjorn's work. I absolutely love this form - and indeed, may attempt it myself one of these days. So I really enjoyed reading your post, Sumana.

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